I’ve never done it myself, but I’ve heard giving birth is, um, challenging. On a scale of one to the most difficult task known to (wo)man, it’s an 11. The prospect of sex after having a baby—no matter your method of delivery—can be daunting for several reasons, not least of which is feeling as though you’ve been drained of all free time and energy. And, of course, the body undergoes intense changes during and after pregnancy, which means the sex you will have will be a little different than it was before baby came along. Different is the key word here, however; sex is still very much on the table (maybe literally? I don’t know your life), but you and your partner(s) will most likely need to navigate the deed with some minor alterations. But no need to freak out, sex is still very possible after the baby comes. As Los Angeles-based sex therapist Vanessa Marin said to Glamour in an article about the same topic, “People are always concerned that their vagina will never go back to normal, but your vagina is designed to do this exact task.” The woman’s got a point.
Things to know:
For penetrative sex, there is a waiting period that you should follow, if loosely.
Docs recommend taking it slow and waiting roughly six weeks after childbirth to resume penetrative sex, for safety reasons. No rules about receiving oral though… just saying.
Chances are, your vagina will not be irrevocably stretched into oblivion.
Your vagina is not only super cute and fun, it’s also super elastic.The muscles will return to pretty much where they left off after a few weeks. Things you’ve heard about uber-flaccid vajays are most likely just myths.
The sensations will be most different when you first start having sex again.
Unfortunately, the first time back in the game—sometimes likened to the sensation of having sex for the first time ever—might not be super pleasurable for you. It will take some time (weeks or months) before sex will feel normal and totally comfortable for you again. Getting back on those kegels (vaginal contractions that strengthen the muscles that make up your pelvic floor) and using extra lube will help!
You can still get pregnant again.
Glove it to love it. Or go make another baby if that’s, like, your thing now. Again, I don’t know your life. (But seriously, your body can create life in rapid succession—how cool is that??)
by Emma Glassman-Hughes